Therapy Frankfurt with Daniela Gottschalk

THE PRIVILEGE OF A LIFETIME IS TO BECOME WHO YOU REALLY ARE

Burn Out is meanwhile a very well known term, mostly associated with a job and business-situation.

Still almost nobody really understands how this condition is characterised and how it develops, although the name couldnt be more precise.

So what is behind that diagnose and which private factors playing along with this condition?

Unlike trauma its not a sudden overwhelming event but a slow process with repeating events where people overstep your bounderies, disrespect your limits (including yourself)-where you are forced to give more than you have or wanna give and where your devotion and work isnt honoured or even seen.

Its an accumulation of situations where you consciously or subconsciously feel exploited and used.

Finding yourself in a stage of BURN OUT means your body and psyche finally hit a long overdue emergency break overpowering the YOU that couldnt help him/herself.

To find a way back from the withdrawl, the powerlessness and the exhaustion into power, action and healthy delimitation is the mission of a nurturing psychotherapy.

When- and wherever two people meet, problems come along.

When love is new, you tolerate a lot and secretly hope to be able to change the other for the better (or: the way we would like him/her to be).

With time, when these wishes dont succed and the pink glasses drop, love vanishes and frustration moves in.

A lot of people succeed in a relationship only past the honeymoon-phase.

A lot of peoole choose with a seemingly psycic ability almost always the "same" type of person with which they navigate the relationship in the always same cul-de-sac where they find no way out again.

LOVE really only starts after the butterfly-in-stomach-phase...and a lot of couples do not even make it to there.

Some crave the intimicy of a familiiar partner but at the same time looking for the exitement of the new and unknown.

They wanna go swimming without getting wet.

Who and how we love, with whom we form connection and why some of us do not connect at all, goes back to our first relationships. Our relationship with our parents and the parents relationship with eachother.

If or if not our mother was a single parent, emotional absent. if our father had affairs outside the marriage and was a raging alcoholic.

If lor if not ove was given in a manipulative way and connected to achievements.

If or if nor violence and lies were part of our life on a daily basis or if we have been seen and respected with all our needs and longings, our fears and hopes is essential to the way we live our relationships today.

We often expect that relationships should give us something we are already missing from early days on, and with thar wish determined to fail.

"You are my everything" should never be a reality.

To make a conscious decission to crave for healthy relationships far away from perfection is something this therapy focuses on.

Addictions, dependencies and co-dependencies can be of substantial or un-substantial nature.

If you light up a cigarette in a stressful situation, start jogging or turn to cake and candy-the motivation behind all of that is the same: to open a so called "side-battlefield".

The addict is missing something, something substantial.

In the substance or the compulsive action s/he is taking, s/he finds something of that.

The procedure/substance creates a short inaffective but still good enough distraction from a feeling that is eating up their soul.

Its a survival mechanism once created out of despair, that is now running and ruining their lifes.

Life gets false and heteronomous.

One can get addicted to almost everything; relationship, sex, the internet ..and the list goes on.

The addiction no matter related to what is always tragic and fatal and the addict will definetely not find a way out of this downwardspiral without professional help.

Griefing is still a big tabu in society.

People are mostly lost for words, send standardized Hallmark-Cards and expect the person to be fully functioning again after some days and weeks

But grieving in reality is rather complex.

How deep grief is depends on many factors-from the relationship to the lost "object" to ones sensitivity and ability to love.

It can take a long time and toll, accompanied by anger, hate, selfblame and hopelessness.

We not only grieve loved ones like humans and animals near and dear to us,-we griefing unlucky situations, lost chances, a failed big love and our lost youth. In life we are confronted again and again to say good bye to someone or something.

If things end unfinished often these farewells are not managable.
So griefing never takes place and instead gets chronic and overwhelming and endlessly postponed.

To cut off connections that are unhealthy or simply hurt, to finally be able to say goodbye and look forwards instead of backwards aswell as cherishing loving relationships beyond deaths and keeping them alive without focusing on the pain is one of the emphasis of my therapeutic work.

Depression or depressive moodswings could be difficulties to adjustment to new situations like a new living- or worksituation. The inability to redefine yourself after a divorce or break up, the loss of a loved one or an overall lack of drive like boredom and frustration of life.

When you realise you didnt match some/most of your goals although you are already in the middle of life (midlifes-crisis).

Probably you find yourself in an unnourishing almost dead relationship that causes more harm than support and joy.

DEPRESSION in general means: Aggression turned inwards, against oneself.

Where life isnt stagnant but flowing, where even unwanted and scary emotions can be felt and expressed, where you hold space for change, individualism, mistakes, failure and new beginnings, there is no ground for depression.

Together we will figure out the underlying resistance and compulsive behaviours that stand in your own way of happiness. Together we created a strong and authentic selfconfident self to stand on solid ground.